Alphabet Series: Jilted

Day Ten: Jilted

“Jilted” typically isn’t a word you see outside a drugstore romance novel, but I think we’ve all been a jilted lover at one time or another.

(I’ll be honest, I had to look this word up to be sure I understood the meaning correctly. Jilt (verb): suddenly reject or abandon (a lover). Now we know with certainty.)

It seems that several of my relationships have ended in some bizarre manner, but usually preceded by days or weeks of little communication on the part of the boy I was dating (and I say “boy” even in reference to the ones older than 21, because their behavior was often boyish and immature, particularly in the breakup process). Even so, I often felt like the jilted lover, rejected suddenly. Maybe I just have a victim complex, but evaluating the situations even years later, I don’t see how I deserved what I got. And that’s something that both men and women experience. It’s just not fair.

The ending of a relationship with little or no explanation often led to feelings of inadequacy, fear and depression. To have cared for someone, to have smiled with them, to have had deep conversations with them, to have gone out of my way to help them and then to see them cast aside consideration for me in the most callous of ways, it stung.

The good news is, the inadequacy, fear and depression fade over time – quicker than I realized in the moment, in some cases. Although I would have rather not gone through those painful times, I’m glad I ended up where I’m supposed to be. I think Cory could say the same.

In the words of my favorite modern-day philosopher, Forrest Gump: That’s all I’ve got to say about that.


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